Funny Sh*t My Captain Says

Updated: February 5, 2026 (Originally published August 30, 2010)

A friend who knew my father recently sent me a book titled Sh*t My Dad Says (HarperCollins 2010). Well not only was it really funny but, apparently, I am not the only one with a blue collar Dad from a big city as the book is currently number 1 on the NYTimes bestseller list.

This got me thinking about two of the most popular threads ever posted to the gCaptain forum:
Best Captain Quotes
Best Bosun Quotes

So as a tip of the hat to justin Halpern we are changing the name of the threads and adding a new one for the guys working on oil rigs offshore: Funny Sh*t my Toolpusher Says

Do you have a funny quote heard aboard ship that wasn’t said by either the Capt. Bos’ or Pusher? Feel free to post it as a comment below…. who knows, maybe gCaptain will get a book deal out of this and have to pay each of you royalties (keep dreaming) !?

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