Okay, so we're working through our merchant mariner issues with grandiosity and pomposity, and inflated self esteem. But what does being a TWIC card holder make you? A practical joker -- A Twic-ster. A chocolate coated wafer candy Twic's. On late night TV, Stoopid Human Twic's. Halloween, Twic or Treat, Fun at the airport with TSA,"This card don't mean twic." New girlfriend, "Is that a Twic in your pocket or are you just glad too..?"